Faux Loko

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This shit is responsible for 97% of all the black out/puke stories I heard in 2010. It is pure evil. A) It tastes like death, B) it’s artificially colored so brightly that it will make your guts glow like Vegas, C) the combination of a lot of booze, a ton of caffeine, and all kinds of other poisons make this stuff an unwitting-suicide attempt in a can.

Ingredients:

20 ounces malt liquor (6-percent ABV)
4 ounces 80-proof vodka (40-percent ABV)
1 Berocca tablet
3 tablespoons Koolaid mix
1 tablespoon sugar
Directions:

1. Put the Berocca tablet into a large jar (preferably 1 quart size).
2. Add 4 ounces (8 tablespoons) of 80-proof vodka, and allow tablet to dissolve most of the way.
3. Slowly add 20 ounces of 6-percent ABV malt liquor.
4. Add 3 tablespoons of Koolaide drink mix and 1 tablespoon of sugar.
5. Stir very gently with a long spoon until sugar is dissolved

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